True Love Still Waits

My sister is finally married! It was nothing short of amazing and glorious and I thank the Lord for what He had set that day. At the age of 27, she married her first and last boyfriend. That’s right. Her first and last.

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Truth be told, my sister is an impulsive type. What she wants, she wants to get it right away. I think that’s part of her dominant personality. But despite that personality in her, there was one thing that she made sure to wait for–the man she would spend the rest of her life with.

In our generation today, everything is instant already even in relationships. Ever heard of instant boyfriend/girlfriend? But looking at my sister’s story, I can say that the line “true love waits” is still very much alive even at this time.

True love waits for the right timing. Actually, no one will be able to tell the exact and right timing in finding love. Only God knows that. But we have to understand that right timing requires being patient. More often than not, we jump into relationships without considering the moment. That’s why a lot of people would say that they met someone but just at the wrong time.

My sister waited patiently for the right time. She had a couple of suitors back when she was still studying but she knew that it was just not the right time to be in a relationship yet. School was a top priority, not love life. And this brings us to the second point.

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True love waits for the right season. It’s so important to know the season we are in. If you’re still a student, your season is about being a student. If you’re trying to get a job, then perhaps your season is getting your career started. There is a right season for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1)–season of being single, getting married, starting a family and the list goes on.

My sister met her  husband at a season in her life that she considered fitting already to engage in a relationship. She was already a nurse then and so was her husband. She was ready for it. And I think that’s how God wants us to be–to be prepared by Him spiritually, emotionally, financially, mentally and physically.

True love waits for the right person. The thing is, right timing and right season will not make sense if you don’t have the right person. You can be at a season for marriage but if you are with the wrong person, it’s never going to be easy. There is no secret formula to finding the one. That is why we need God’s leading in this area. I have actually written about this already and you can check it here.

I know we all want things to be fast. But may we remember to exclude love with that because waiting for true love has not gone out of style.

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Single Is Not Equal To Ugly

Hello beautiful single ladies!

I hope you had a blast celebrating LOVE day because I sure did! I went on an eat-all-you-can sushi buffet at Ramen Yah with the bf/bff and we were so stuffed I thought I promised not to eat sushi for a month after (but of course, that promise is all gone now that I’m hungry again).

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Anyway, I hope that whether with or without a date, you had looked your best last Sunday. Not because you’re trying to impress someone or you’re on prey mode (say what?) but because you know that single is not equal to ugly. What am I trying to say here?

Well, have you ever had that notion wherein as a single lady, you just don’t care with how you look? You don’t give a care because you’re not trying to impress anybody anyway. Perhaps you have a firm confidence that you are beautiful no matter what. If you are that person, let me say that your notion is very right.

Inner Beauty > Outward Beauty

It’s true that we should never try to impress people with our looks. It’s also true that we need to believe that we are beautiful no matter what others say because that’s what God says about us. He said that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made..” and His “works are wonderful.” He also said in His Word that:

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” (1 Peter 3:3,4)

It means that inner beauty is still the most important thing no matter how cliche it sounds. Outward beauty can never surpass a beautiful heart especially one that is aligned with God’s.

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One becomes greatly beautiful on the outside regardless of flaws because the beauty on the inside is radiating through. And the thing is, we can never find this kind of security anywhere else except in Jesus.

Inner Beauty + Outward Beauty = Desirable

But does this mean that it’s okay to not care about our physical looks? I don’t think so. We also need to do our part. Just like what Michelle McKinney Hammond wrote on her book titled “What To Do Until Love Finds You”:

“A lady-in-waiting should always look the part whether a knight is in sight or not. After all, you never know when he’ll appear. And when  he does, spiritual plus beautiful equals highly desirable.”

I wish I can write down the whole chapter of the book here because there are so much things that I wanted you to read but since that’s obviously impossible, I urge you to grab a copy of the book and read the entire thing. I promise you won’t regret it.

So what now?

There are several ways that we can do to look after our physical appearance and it varies from one woman to another. The important thing is that we never lose the willingness to fight the good fight of personal upkeep. So, here are few of the ways I think we can do to keep our outward appearance on fleek. *wink*

EXPLORING THE WORLD OF MAKEUP. Don’t get me wrong. I still believe that natural beauty is better. But let’s be realistic and admit that makeup is almost every woman’s weapon against stressful nights, haggard days and archenemy pimples and breakouts! If you’re not into all those cosmetic stuff, I understand because I too sometimes have no idea!

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But get your basics on (read: eyebrows, blush, foundation, lipstick) and you’re good to go. Don’t be afraid to explore! Also, I bet my sisters out there would agree that MAKEUP is FUN! The key is not to overdo it and to remember that your identity is not in how good you look with it

KEEPING IT HEALTHY. Okay, I’m guilty with this one. I don’t have a healthy lifestyle and I’m not proud of it. But once in a while, I do try. Sometimes, I go to the gym to get me some exercise. I try to control my eating habits.

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I try to eat healthy. I try to sleep early…okay…I fail at that most of the time…but the point is, do something to stay healthy! Feeling good on the outside should start with feeling good on the inside and sometimes that’s all it takes. I better start living on this one too.

PAMPER & BEAUTY TIME. When was your last salon visit? When was the last time you had your nails done? When was the last time you visited the spa? I know this can be expensive but once in a while (if you have the budget), treat yourself to some pamper and beauty time. Or if you think you can DIY, why not? Don’t let the busyness and stress of the world drain out the beauty in you.

PASSION FOR FASHION. Well, not really passion. I just wrote that because it rhymes and I personally think that the way we dress up plays an important factor in our overall look. The truth about fashion is that it’s a personal thing so it should never make you look like you’re dressing up as someone else.

But try doing a wardrobe check and see if you ought to need a wardrobe update. I’m not saying throw out all your clothes and buy new ones (although you can actually do that if you have loads of money. lol). Just try experimenting or exploring according to your style and preferences. And if you need help, there are thousands of sources out there that you can turn to for reference.

Here’s a good news:

I’m going to hold a giveaway and it’s going to be a collaboration with my fashion blogger friend Katrin Lapeña of Katwinvasion and Iligan’s most trusted fashion online shop Xina Maldita by Sheena Prete. Fashion pieces are at stake so stay tuned for the official giveaway announcement.

Until then, stay beautiful ladies! ❤

 

 

 

 

The Beautiful Single Life

 

I’m a little late in welcoming the second month of the year because I’ve been so busy but nonetheless, hello February! This month is such a perfect excuse to go all out in writing about love and relationships so before we reach the 29th of February, that’s what I’m going to do.

And first on my list:  Talk about the beautiful single life.

As you all know, Valentine’s Day is coming up and I’m sensing that there are some single ladies out there who are sighing because they are currently “zero” in the “love life” area. Some may be even worried that they won’t receive anything. If you are that person, I’m going to tell you this–Stop it!

I’m not making you stop because it’s cheesy or corny or pitiful but because I want you to understand that singlehood is a very beautiful season and February 14 is just a day that will go by so quickly.

THE SINGLE LIFE STAGE

There is so much to love about being single and it will take a whole book if I’m going to write everything down. But just remember that this particular stage in life is a time that you can never get back once you get married or have children. Bye-bye to freedom, to I-can-do-whatever-I-want moments, to staying up late, to spending 90% of your budget to food, clothes and makeup, to making own decisions–you know what I mean. In short, “When the spouse doesn’t exist, you can’t hurt them with your selfless, impulsive decisions.” (Marshal Segal)

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I’m not putting a bad light on marriage here as if it is a scary place. Of course, not! It’s a beautiful season on its own as well. I dream to get married soon but I recently realized that before that day comes, I want to be able to maximize my single life–you know, the feeling of no big commitment to someone else yet.

And even if I am in a relationship right now to an awesome man, I consider myself single by papers and before God. That’s why I don’t want to act “wife” to him yet because that’s not a role I am called to do already. I am technically still single and I love embracing that fact. At this point, I want to savor every moment of the single life stage.

THANKING GOD FOR THIS SEASON

The truth is, sometimes I get impatient and try to ask God to let me move on to the next season already. But I realize that I have got to hit on the brakes! If I spend lots of time thinking so much about marriage, I might miss the good things in my current season.

I’m not saying that it’s wrong to think about getting married and all. In fact, we should be praying about it as early as possible if we desire so. But I realized that where I am right now is a season that God has placed in my life to revel in and enjoy. Before, I say “I can’t wait to get married!” Right now, I’m praying, “Lord, thank you for this season of waiting. Let me enjoy this moment while preparing me at the same time for the next one.”

I read in one of Rica Peralejo’s blog post that “each season is beautiful and purposeful.” I couldn’t agree more.

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And at times I get impatient, I go back to the word in Ecclesiastes 3:1:

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens…”

If you are single, do not fret and do not rush. The Word says, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34)

If you have been waiting for Mr. Right for so long already, do not worry. Use the time to reflect and be aware of how God is moving in this time of your life. God has a purpose for you in your current season. Find it out and embrace it.

If you are in a relationship with someone but not married yet, enjoy the season but at the same time treasure the person that God has blessed you with.

If you are dateless this coming Feb. 14, no problem, it’s going to be on a Sunday. Have your date with God in church. :p

Women With Vision

It’s finally 2016! Hooray for the new year! I know many are excited by this time with what’s ahead or what’s in store. Some are probably planning already or listing down goals to achieve. Perhaps others have visions of what to do in the next 12 months.

If you are one of those people, that’s good! But if you haven’t even thought of doing such, it’s not too late yet!

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“Do I really need to have goals or visions in my life?”

I say yes! Don’t worry if you answered “no.” I used to think that way too. I’ve never been so particular about achieving goals or envisioning my future because I’m a very steady person. But now that I’m a bit older and I know bigger responsibilities will pile up soon, I realized that I need to change–from being a “just go with the flow” to “woman with vision.”

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To inspire us to start our year right, we gathered over coffee to talk about the power of vision. It says in Proverbs 29:11 (KJV), “Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.” 

Vision plays an important role in determining our future. Sometimes we base our decisions on it and take steps because of it. But while we have our hearts and minds set on things already, it’s essential not to forget that our vision is defined by God.

He is the one who gives us a clear picture of what He wants us to be and how He wants us to get there.  And with the right vision, we will:

  • Know our purpose in life
  • Set our focus on the goals
  • Ignite our passion
  •  Know our priorities
  • Remain on the right track
  • Overcome any obstacles or trials

It’s not easy to think about the future especially since we have no idea how things will turn out for us. It’s exciting but at the same time scary. But may we never forget that the future is bright already because of what Jesus did on the cross for us.

So ladies, get your pen and paper and start being a woman with vision!

When we have a clear vision from God, we will also see that God has given us every resource we need to accomplish the task.

If we have a vision, we will remain clear on our priorities and keep ourselves on the right track.

Vision fuels our passion, creates momentum, and keeps us focused on the goal.

We can only know our purpose when we know our God and receive His vision for us.

 

 

Ladies, Don’t Give It All Just Yet!

Being in a relationship with someone is a beautiful thing. But if we don’t accompany it with wisdom, it may lead us to making wrong decisions and may even become the cause of our own downfall. That is why, ladies, unless you are married to the person you are in a relationship with, don’t give it all just yet!

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This does not mean that you give love and care halfheartedly. It only means that since you are still not tied together by marriage, it’s important that you put boundaries in your relationship. There are certain couple privileges that can only be attained within the bounds of marriage. Let’s not try to make our own rules.

Get to know each other better

The stage that you are in is basically the time to get to know each other better.

  • That’s the time you stir up each other with nothing other than conversations about interests, goals, dreams and life stories.
  • If you have just known each other, it’s the perfect time to catch up on the big and small things that has happened in your life.
  • It’s the time you spend getting to know each other’s family and friends.
  • It’s the time of discovering each other’s strengths and weaknesses, as well as random things that you could think of saying or joking about.
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Personally, I think this stage is just a wonderful one. It’s in these times that you create moments together as singles.

Respecting each other’s privacy

Just because you are in a relationship, doesn’t mean that you have to share everything and constantly be together. A lot of relationships end up down the drain because of “suffocation” or too much control that it sometimes end up being unhealthy. It’s best to respect each other’s privacy while you are both single as it promotes more love and trust with each other.

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WIFE, submit yourself to your husband.

I hope you noticed the emphasis on the word wife right there. Sometimes we tend to be that woman who gives it all. We tend to be that woman who plays a role that we are not even called to do yet. Unless he has already put a ring on it, don’t be a wife. Save it for the real thing.

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By the way, this whole submission thing to your husband is pretty controversial so that’s going to be another whole new post if ever I do get to it (although I don’t think it will be any time soon since I’m not a wife yet!).

Seek individually.

Praying together is a great thing to do together. But while we are still in the process of waiting for God’s perfect timing, it is best to seek God individually. It is best to hear more from what God has to say. Just because you are already in a relationship, doesn’t mean you should stop seeking Him about it. No. All the more that you should seek.

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Saving the best for the right time.

In every relationship, touch is essential. In fact, touch is therapeutic. But while we show love by our touch, it’s important to remember to never cross the line or better yet, don’t even think of going there.

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There are certain things that we need to save for marriage and yes, I’m talking about sex. The world calls “saving yourself” for marriage old-fashioned but the Word says otherwise. This is not about the pride of being a virgin on the night of your honeymoon. It’s about honoring God with your body, obeying Him because you love Him. When you wait for the right time, you reap its rewards. There is glory in waiting! #trueLovewaits

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Do you think this is way too ideal? Well, I think so too. But by the grace of God, this is possible. It is possible to to put up these boundaries in our relationship. It is possible to love and respect your partner by God’s standards. It is possible to remain pure while waiting. It is possible not to give it all just yet!

Forevermore: Where Did Alex Go Wrong?

With the hype of Forevermore still lingering on, I thought I should share something about Alex’s (played by Erich Gonzales) downfall.

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Honestly, I only started watching the most talked TV show two weeks before its finale. I wasn’t really there to witness the whole Xander-Agnes love story. I only got interested when I found out Erich (a favorite local actress of mine) was playing a role as “Alex”, the perky, jolly and without any doubt very confident veterinarian. She met Xander when he was at his lowest point and Alex acted like some sort of lifesaver trying to make him smile or laugh with her very…well, not so sophisticated jokes.

Don’t get me wrong. Alex was lovable. Her positive disposition was highly infectious. She was kind, radiant and caring (especially to animals of all sorts). She could easily blend in with people. If she were real, any man would love her as she is. So how could Xander just leave her like that? 


This is where Alex might have gone wrong.

There was this one episode, if you remember, when she willingly admitted that it was her who made a first move on Xander. It was her asking him out on a date and it was her chasing after him. To simply put, she was “courting” him. Now, I have nothing against that. I mean, who am I to judge? But ladies, we need to remember that we were not designed to pursue men because it’s supposed to go the other way around. It’s so important for you to realize what the Designer intended when He created you.

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You might be thinking, “What guys can do, girls can do better!” Well maybe—maybe not. But according to the Bible, roles aren’t based on who is more proficient or able, or whose turn it is, or who wants to have a go at it. We need to understand the roles that have been assigned to us as women.


The Leadership Role

Amongst the various roles appointed to men and women in the Bible, men are appointed the role of LEADERSHIP. This is actually true in the church and in the family. But this does not mean male superiority or greater significance of men. It is simply God’s purpose and assignment of equally valuable roles among spiritually equal beings. Men initiate, women respond. 


Nature of Men

One thing I noticed about some men is that when they want something so bad, they will do anything to get it! In fact, they may never even stop until they finally get what they want. It can be the same when they want to win the heart of the woman they love. They’d put out extra effort and go out the extra mile just to get and hear the sweet sound of “YES”. When they do such pursuit, it means that you are that valuable. You are that worth it. And every woman should be. Girl, you are a Tiffany diamond, remember that! Read more here.

“But men can be so passive! They take too long to make the move. I’d like to put matters in my own hands.”

How many of you had to go through this thought because this one guy just won’t budge? And why isn’t he doing anything anyway? Well, there can be two possible reasons: 

1.) He’s just really shy or waiting for the perfect timing.
2.) He’s just really not into you. 

Assuming you’re in situation 1, you have to remember what love is. 1 Corinthians 13:4 tells us, “Love is patient…”

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I know it wasn’t entirely Alex’s fault. Xander, heavily heartbroken, also led her on thinking that entering into another relationship will perhaps fix his shattered heart. Both Xander and Alex had something to do with the demise of their short affair.

Anyway, to end, I just want you to remember this: Proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” You are to be found. You are to be pursued.